As a Christian, I am supposed to become like Christ Jesus. This is God's plan for His people; this is why we take the name "Christian." But when I look at my life I don't feel very much like Jesus. Part of that is normal. It's a long journey from being sinful by nature and inclined to hate God and my neighbor to being holy and loving and perfect like Jesus. But other times after I've slipped back into sinful habits or given into temptation or lost control of my desires yet again, I think that it's embarrasing how little progress I've made in years of following Christ.
I'd like to become more like Jesus. At the very least, I think I want to become more like Jesus. But so often I struggle to live that out. I read the stories of Jesus—who He was and what kinds of things He did. I know God's commands and instructions for life as His child. But sometimes my effort seems terribly lacking. I think about making changes in my life and fail to follow through because sin is so much easier and more familiar. The Christian life isn't supposed to be easy; Jesus compares discipleship to taking up one's cross and losing one's life. Again and again I chicken out. Here's an example: I think I spend too much time on my phone. I'd like to change. But I don't take any drastic steps. I make vague promises to myself about trying to cut back, but I only follow through for a day or two if at all. So many times I end up thinking more about games I can play or articles I can read than how I can follow my Savior and Lord. That makes it hard to grow.
And to make matters worse, I also sometimes have these weird and clearly wrong feelings of thinking that I don't really need to grow all that much. I struggle to realize where and how badly I fail to live up to Jesus' standards. Returning to my example, I know there's a line between rightfully enjoying God's good gifts through things like hobbies and ignoring God and others by wasting my time. But in my mind, I'm pretty sure I draw that line where I want it instead of where God would say it is. It's so easy to take good things like hobbies—things that can even be beneficial for my mental health—and value or focus on them too much, turning them into idols that devastate my spiritual health. It's so easy to absorb the standards of the world around me and convince myself that those standards are the same as Jesus' standards.
I want to become more like Jesus. I want to be willing to make sacrifices for Him. I really believe He's worth it. I know I'm going to need help. I need to do a better job of seeking accountability from one or two close fellow Christians. And even more importantly, I need Jesus' help. There's good news here—thank the Lord! Jesus gives all of His people the gift of the Holy Spirit. The Spirit is always at work to transform me and help me grow. So I need to work as hard as I can at discipleship, at growing in Christlikeness. And at the same time I also need to trust the process, that the Spirit is refining me and bringing my new self to life. I can work with the confidence that God will finish His work, that through His power I will become what He wants me to be. Time to renew my commitment.
Grace and peace,
BMH
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